This conversation is sponsored by The Bouqs. All thoughts and opinions on these beautiful fresh flowers are 100% my own.
I planned to write this post yesterday, and perhaps I should have. It would have been peppy. It would have discussed how I put washi tape onto a vase to make a cute Christmas vase for my front table in two minutes flat. I also would have dwelt on what a fun gift fresh flowers are, especially for a hostess gift. Even if you are too far away to attend a party, you can convey the sentiment that you wish you were there by sending flowers.
If I had written this post yesterday then I would have shown you the mega secure packaging in which my Bouqs arrived. I would have dwelt on the few extra fresh flowers included in each box just in case any got damaged during shipping. I would have discussed how cool and environmentally friendly it is that these flowers are grown on a volcano in South America and are not cut until they are ordered. I most definitely would have gushed about the flat rate, affordable pricing, and the concierge service from The Bouqs that can allow you to get a beautiful shipment each month throughout the year. I would have written a post waxing on and on about each of these things if I had posted yesterday.
But I didn’t, and today is . . . different.
Today there was a high school shooting at my alma mater, Arapahoe High School. We are living with my dad to save money, so every teenager that I work with each week at church was in that building. I was a wreck. All of them were blessed to be able to exit the building safely and physical unscarred, but the emotional scarring is a very different story. As it turns out, some of the sweet teenagers were friends with the young man who did the shooting. Close friends. They saw no warnings. They can’t wrap their heads around what has happened. They are crushed. I spent the day worrying about their safety, and now my heart is heavy as I worry about their hearts.
Once upon a time I too had a broken heart, but from a different type of personal tragedy. My mother passed away after a long battle with breast cancer when I was in college, and one month later my fiance dumped me flat. To say that I was heartbroken and confused and crushed and angry at God would be a very great understatement indeed.
I don’t remember much about that time period. I have never been great about facing my trials with dignity and faith and clarity of mind. I have been really good about holing up in my own little world and trying to close out the world. It’s a problem. Sigh. I have glimpses of sharp mental images from that time period. I remember my sister sleeping at my apartment to walk me to class each morning. I remember being surrounded by new and old friends on my birthday as I blew out my candles many months later. And I remember the flowers.
When news got out about my mom’s passing the flowers started to roll in. Endless, endless flowers. I’m not sure what they meant to my dad, but I do know what they meant to me: HOPE. Hope that I could survive this trial. Hope that I could bloom in adversity, just as my astonishing mother did. Hope that tomorrow would be a better day.
Each day I busied myself with the flowers. Flowers of every variety and size and color filled up the house. There were enough arrangements sent that I was able to put some in every room. All day long I wandered around, watering them, rearranging them, smelling them, switching up their locations, and even just sitting and looking at them. I have a vivid memory of the massive basket of peach flowers that my dad’s law firm sent to our family. I remember sitting on my mama’s peach couch in front of her ugly peach sponge painted wall smiling at that basket of peach flowers. I knew how much she would have loved them, and I knew that the people at the firm loved her and my dad enough to have remembered that peach was her favorite color. Those flowers brought me so much peace and comfort. So much.
Since that time, my dad has started sending me flowers. He is a man of very few words, but he is also very observant and sensitive to his girls. He noticed me fussing with the flowers and reveling in the flowers during my time of grief, and so now he sends them to me. He sends them for birthdays, anniversaries, when I had my babies, for the first day of school when I was teaching, and anytime I am struggling . . . just to say that he is thinking of me. And each time it means so much. My dear, dear friend who was with me the week following my mother’s death sent me flowers each year on the anniversary of her death for years, just because she knew how much they would comfort me on such a sad anniversary.
My mother has now been gone for ten long years. I miss her terribly. Sometimes it seems like we were just laughing together yesterday, but sometimes I cry because I can’t remember what her laugh sounded like. It was a jolly laugh, of that I am sure.
One of the ways that I feel connected to my mother is by working on her family’s genealogy. She is the only person in her family who has really gotten into the research, and when she passed away it just stopped being done. Several years ago I felt prompted to pick up where she left off, and miracles and tender mercies followed which allowed me to continue her work in a big way, but that is a post for another day. I recently helped my dad remodel and redecorate his main floor. It was bittersweet to watch those peach couches leave, but we have managed to work together to create a beautiful new space that still has her spirit in it.
My absolute favorite part of the redecorating project is my ancestor gallery wall. This pictures only shows about a fourth of it. (I will reveal the entire thing at some point soon.) Each time I walk by it I can feel the love and support radiating from the pictures. Not literally, necessarily, because I am not a person who has many big spiritual experiences in that sense. But I would just like to think that they are aware of me and are looking in on my little life every once in a while from Heaven. Seeing them so prominently displayed reminds me of my heritage and how my mom became such an amazing woman.
This is my Grandma Barbara. Isn’t she a beauty?? She is my mother’s mother and she and I were extremely close before she passed away when I was thirteen. One of the things my mom inherited from her was a set of three Christmas carolers. I love bringing them out each Christmas and thinking of her. What a strong, independent woman! I love those carolers, and I love my grandma, so when I received these stunning white roses from The Bouqs I knew it would bring me joy to put them in a spot in our home that already brought me comfort and memories.
As I walked up and down my dad’s curving stairway today I glanced at those roses and felt a touch of hope. After all this time flowers still bring me comfort and peace. I actually didn’t order these roses. I ordered the stunning white ranunculus that were shown on my Christmasy front entry table. These came in a bonus package that I wasn’t expecting. What a tender mercy they have been to me as I have felt sorrow and worry over this tragedy at my former high school!
If you have anyone in your life who is struggling I would encourage you to give them the gift of comfort with some beautiful fresh flowers. If they are accompanied by a heartfelt note it will be all the better. You do not need a huge reason like death to give the gift of comfort. There are so many struggles in this life—health, grief, financial, marital, loneliness, infertility, depression, job stresses, and so many more. Don’t your loved ones deserve to know that you are thinking of them? I think so. Which I why I will be writing a couple of letters and delivering some beautiful fresh flowers to a couple of heartbroken teenagers tomorrow. I hope that the flowers will bring a bit of comfort to them, just as they always have done for me.
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If you would like to win a full year of free flower deliveries, then be sure to enter by going to The Bouqs website and creating an account. Then come back here and leave a comment on this post of the person whom your would like to send a Bouq to, along with the link or name of the Bouq that you would like to send. As a little bonus, you will receive a 20% off coupon once you have created an account. You will not regret having done so. In all of my years of receiving flowers in the mail—which, as you can tell, are many—I have never gotten such fresh, long-lasting flowers. And I’m not whistling dixie—that is the absolute truth! I am a believer in The Bouqs now, through and through. Good luck, sweet friends, and thank you for listening.
Marlene says
I would send the Pretty in Pink roses to my daughter Dena. She is battling breast cancer and the flowers would make her smile. A years worth of flowers would be wonderful. Thank you for this giveaway.
Esther F. says
You touched my heart with this post.
I am so sorry to hear about the shooting. I am a teacher in a highschool /college and I am glad we have never had anything near this tragedy happen here. I hope the teenagers you work with can give this shooting a place in their lives without it becoming a trauma.
Sending love your way.
Christy K. says
Such a beautiful, heartfelt post and I am so very sorry for the loss of your mother. My Mom and I are very close and I could never imagine a time without her around. I would have a hard time choosing who to send flowers too if I only had to choose one so winning a years worth would make that decision a lot easier. Off course I would send some to my Mom just because she is a wonderful person who loves her family so much and is always there to help us out no matter what. But I would also choose my mother-in-law. Earlier on in our marriage when we had more money, would would always send her flowers for Mother’s Day or her birthday. But times got very tough and we have not been able to do so in many years. We used to take a vacation every year and drive from Florida to North Carolina to visit my in-laws for a week, but that stopped due to lack of money as well. I hated the fact that my husband went several years without seeing his parents, yet I was blessed to see mine almost every day. My mother-in-law has Multiple Sclerosis really bad. She can hardly walk. Even now that we all live in Tennessee, even being two hours apart, we still don’t see each other very often because it is hard for her to have visitors and she cannot travel. Our 7 1/2 year old daughter was 3 1/2 before she finally met my husband’s parents and has only seen them one time since, which was a little over two years ago. So even though we don’t get to visit often, I would definitely love to send some flowers to her if I had a way just to remind her how much we care and love her.
Melissa Licon says
My mom, treasured boqu.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your loved ones. May grace abound and peace settle in the hearts of everyone that must be struggling to understand and cope with the situation.
Debra Womack says
Your post made me cry. 🙁
I wasn’t going to enter this – I’ve NEVER received flowers for anything.
But because I’ve never received flowers for anything, maybe it would be nice to get them for myself.
Sarah Westover McKenna says
I’m sorry that I made you cry, but you DEFINITELY deserve some flowers! Good luck!!
Heather says
What a beutiful post! Sending or receiving flowers is a special event full of love and thoughtfulness . Sorry about your mom passing.
Erin @ DIY on the Cheap says
What a beautiful post! I have always loved flowers and thought they were a beautiful gift to give someone, especially when you just don’t have words for the occasion.
I would send flowers to my sister because she has been really stressed after having a new baby and learning to be a new mother of two.
Katie says
What a beautiful post–I could feel the love from your heart. The hope that a new day will bring happiness and peace! I would send flower to my 90 year old great aunt. I always bring her flowers every time I go to visit and I know she would love getting them monthly!
Elisabeth says
That was a lovely and well written post. 🙂
I signed up on The Bouqs. I know it’s not popular to give men flowers but I just know my Dad would love these: https://www.thebouqs.com/en/volcano-collection/86-the-golden-globes.html
Yellow is his favorite color, and these are so sunny and bright!
Kimber says
So heartfelt. I can’t wait to check out Bouq’s. We live far from family so we send things often and this sounds so helpful!
Emily @ Two Purple Couches says
Oh, I couldn’t make it through your post without tearing up! I can definitely understand what you mean about flowers symbolizing Hope; to me they are bright, happy, and optimistic. I love having a fresh bouquet in my home, and I miss them when I don’t. Just have a bouquet on my counter or coffee table brings an immediate smile to my face.
I’ve never heard of The Bouqs, but I just looked at the site, and oh my! What a beautiful selection!
Tara @ Suburble says
Oh wow… I’m so sorry that you lost your mother, Sarah. It’s a loss that I can’t even imagine.
It’s so touching that your dad still keeps up his tradition of sending you flowers. They mean so many different things to different people, don’t they?
I think that to have a symbol of hope in your house is a powerful thing. I would surround myself with that symbol as well.
Karie says
https://www.thebouqs.com/en/volcano-collection/145-jingle-bells.html I would love to send this red and blue bouquet to my grandma. She loves red white and blue. She wears only red white and blue. She decorates with red white and blue her house is white with red shutters and a blue door. It is the perfect bouquet for her. I don’t know how laugh longer she will be around. Thanks for the intro to this site
Sarah Westover McKenna says
Oh my word! I love her and I don’t even know her! 🙂
Vanessa says
So lovely!
I would love to send flowers to my husband. He has stand up for me when I couldn’t and is always by my side pampering me trying to make me forget the pain I live in (Fibromyalgia). On top of that he is the best father I could have ever dream of for my child, he is devoted to us and we love him for that.
Hailey says
I really enjoyed your post. I would send my future mother in law the zest bouquet because she always wears this amazing yellow jacket and I swear she is the only person I know that can pull off that yellow and I love it!
Jenn says
Such a beautiful post Sarah! It is amazing how such a small gestures like sending flowers can make such a big impact! Hugs to you and sending lots of virtual flowers your way! xo
Colleen C says
What a touching article. Thank you. I feel for your right now, and can’t imagine what you are going through – or what those teens are going through. Just know I am sending thoughts and prayers in your direction.
You are so right about flowers and the comfort that they bring. You’ve reminded me that I don’t get flowers anymore. My husband used to dutifully pick some up here and there, but I think they have become and expensive extravagance and he just stopped. It’s to bad. I just love flowers. The fragrance the look. Arranging them. When I was single I bought arrangements for myself a few times a month. I think I will start again. I deserve them. We all do.
If I win, my first arrangement would be sent to my sister. She lives a days drive away from us, so we don’t see each other often. Pink is her favourite colour, so I would send this bouquet: Treasured. I love the roses and the lillies. It’s gorgeous – and pink!
All the best for the holidays, and speedy healing to all who have been touched by this tragedy.
Colleen C says
PS: I love your Dad!
Sarah Westover McKenna says
Me too!! 🙂 (Do you know him or do you love the theoretical idea of him? He’s the BEST!)
Colleen says
I don’t know him, but any Dad that pays that much attention to his kids rocks!!!
Sarah Westover McKenna says
Just wondering! Old friends have found me on here before! 🙂
Christi says
I would send the Precious bouq to my mom. Last week my husband and I lost our baby at 20 weeks and she flew all the way to Chicago that night to be here for us during the silent deliverY and extended her stay to 10 days so she could be here for the funeral and burial as well. It meant the world to have her here with me.
Sarah Westover McKenna says
This made me cry. So sorry for your loss!!! Thinking of you…
Jenny Hawkes says
I’d love to send roses to my mother-in-law, Nancy.
Angelina-JoJo and Eloise says
What a BEAUTIFUL and Heart felt post, Sarah. Flowers are a TIMELESS gift.
xoxo
Sarah Westover McKenna says
Thanks, friend!
Kieran Osgood says
Beautiful post … Thank you for remembering the students..
At this time I would give the gift to my sweet neighbor who is an angel sent to help me survive heartbreak and loss.
In one weeks time I was served divorce papers and let go from a 20 year job that was my only known career. I was left with bankruptcy for credit and loss of the family unit I treasured and a 20 year career of passion in one swift unexpected blow.This was shortly after my father passed away. I was now faced with a fixer upper house, twin 10 yr old boys to take care of and no job. Since I was the breadwinner I receive no child support no alimony and had to buy out my ex for the house with my pension, A fixer up with leaks and issues my ex the carpenter was “to fix up’…if I left
would have no place to live and my boys would lose the security of the only home they knew! My now 65 year old neighbor who I now call my guardian angel and I forged an unusual relationship and became close.
She had known the boys since they were born but I was busy working and taking care of my home and boys. I was always curious about her before that time as she seemed like quite a hermit taking care of her aging mom. I was always kind to her talking to her about her gardens but not much more. She taught me how to garden. I reached out to her as a friend during her time of grief in losing her mom and now being a lone with no family . We adopted her in ways . Now she has taken great care of my boys and I even though she has nothing to live on but social security. She is my new family. She has taught me so much about strength of character and being a good friend and strong woman when others have disappeared. She taught me to stop being a stifled little girl who hated the world because of her situation and to buck up to my reality and be an independent woman. Shortly before my divorce I learned she was married and divorced and a working girl until 40 and fixed to move home with her mom. she lost her house and horses and gardens. I never would have known ! She always thinks of others in our neighborhood and is helping and encouraging . I am not sure I would be standing right now if it weren’t for the for her. She will not allow me to give up on myself or my boys. Together we now go to the food pantry and live on food stamps and coupons. We help each other and look out for one another. She taught me how to live frugally and on love for others in need. Especially now at the holidays. Although things have changed for me and I am going to lose my house soon if I can’t find employment and I have no money for bills or gifts this year I am no longer scared . I have learned that the lessons I teach my boys are the most important. I am grateful that I have each day to try again and grateful for my guardian angel who lives next door who is there to remind me that when we have nothing it still feels better to give! There is always something you can give.. I am giving love and smiles and encouragement to others in need . Thanks for letting me share this post that started because I wanted to give a friend a gift when I couldn’t afford one but ended with revelation and enlightenment for me . The unseen gifts keep coming! Merry Christmas and God bless us all! 🙂
Sarah Westover McKenna says
Wow. What a story!! I am so so sorry for all that you have been through, but your neighbor sounds like an amazing kindred spirit! My fingers and toes are crossed for you to get a job soon!!